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~♥~Usman Is Here~♥~
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Aik Pagal Dosray Pagal Say Kehta Hai........,Tum Kiss Din Paida Hoye?........,Dosra Pagal Itwaar Ko~........,Pehla Pagal........,Tum Mujhy Pagal Bana Rahay Ho........,Itwaar ko tu chhooti hoti hai........,
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Galileo used to study in small lamp........,Graham bel used to study in candle........,Shakespare used to study in street lite........,Menu aye samjh nai aandi........,Din nu chars peenday c saray........,
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Wife: Gana ga rahi thi........,Husband: Jab tum gaati ho tu lagta hai indra gandhi ga rahi hai........,Wife: Lekin ussay tu gana hi nahi aata tha........,Husband: Tay anni diye tenu kera aanda aye........,
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Ik bacha ik ghar ki bel bajanay ki koshish kar raha tha........,Ik baba gee ne dekha tu uss ke paas ja ke bel baja di........,Aur pocha beta aur kuch kaam........,Bacha bola........,Baba gee hoon nasso........,
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Jo shakhs jumeraat ke rooz bahir chaltay hoye inn alfaaz ka wird kar ga woh Inshallah mala maal ho jaye ga........,ALLAH ke naam pe de de baba........,
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Aghar dunya main kuch kar ke dekhana hai tu sun lo........,Haathi ke upar ulta khara ho kar photo khinchwao........,Aur phir photo ko ulta kar ke dunya ko dekhao........,
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Oo mere dil day chain........,Tere peechay kuttay pain........,Tu lutiya mere dil da chain........,Rab kary tenu keeray pain........,Tere nain bary nasheelay........,Jewien jharoo day teelay........,Tu mere dil wich enjh wasi........,Jewien chikar wich maj phasi........,Janay jigar janay tamana........,Eddar aa teriyan lattan pannan........,
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Ik anjabi shehar ki ajnabi gali main........,Ik khirki khuli ik parda hata aur........,Ik masoom si larki ne apni........,Chanchal awaaz main kaha........,Paa jamnoo ki paa nii........,
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Inn aankhon se sapnay churaya na karo........,Humari dosti ko azmaya na karo........,Tumhary ik sms ke badlay 100 dafa call kar don........,Par shart ye hai ke tum phone uthaya na karo........,
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Boaht udaas hai koi shakhs tumhary jaanay say........,Ho sakay tu laut aao kisi bahanay se........,Aaj phir police tumhien doondh rahi hai........,Aaj phir lota gaib hai masjid ke gusal khanay se........,
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Mareez Doctor se: heart transplant ke baad mujhy dance aur paisa acha lagnay laga hai........,Kya main jawaan ho gaya hoon?........,Doctor: Nahi tumhien jo dil lagaya hai woh hijray ka hai........,
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Girl to sheikh: Mujhy apni breslet de do main iss ko dekh ke tumhien yaad karon gi........,Sheikh: Tum ye soch mujhy yaad kar lena ke main ne maangi thi aur uss ne nahi di........,
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Aik sheikh 4th floor say neechay gira........,Girty hoye kitchen ki window ke paas pochancha tu apni biwi ko dekh kar chilaya........,Oo meri rooti na pkaeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnn........,
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Sardar doctor say: Oye tenu taankay laanay aanday ne?........,Doctor: Haan g dasoo kithay laanay ne?........,Sardar: Aa zara meri juuti nu tay la day........,
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Sardar: Aj main apni class di sub tu sohni kurri phasai aye........,Friend: Oo Kiwien?........,Sardar: Class lagi c main kaghaz da jahaan bana ke uda dita........,Oo teacher de nak te ja wajeya........,Onay gussay wich pocheya ke aye kinnay keeta?........,Main oss kurri da naa la dita........,Phas gai vichaari........,
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Aik sardar beach par leta hua tha ke wahan say aik angraiz guzra aur sardar say pocha are you relaxing?........,Sardar: No i am bunta singh........,Phir dubara aik angraiz guzra aur uss ne be yehi pocha are you relaxing?........,Sardar gussay se: No i am bunta singh........,Aur ye keh ke uth gaya aur apnay se kuch door letay hoye angraiz se pocha are you relaxing?........,Angraiz: Ye i am relaxing........,Sardar: Oye khoteya tennu peechay loog labh labh ke thak gaye ne tay tu ethay araam kar raya ain........,
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Aik jahaaz ka engine kharab ho gaya sub ne parashote le kar jump laga di........,Akhir main aik hindu reh gaya us ke liye parashote nahi bacha........,Majbooran ussay wessy hi chalaang lagani pari........,Girtay hoye woh aik sardar ge ke paas se guzra........,Sardar ne hindu ko itni speed main jatay dekh ke apna parashote choor diya aur bola........,Saday naal raceaan........,
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Sardar building se gira........,Doctor said: He is dead........,Sardar hoosh main aa ke bola main zinda wan........,Sardarni boli: Pya reh kanjra tenu doctor nalo bhota pata aye........,
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Pathan bohat dair say aik haseen larki ko ghoor raha tha........,Larki sharma ke kya dekh rahay ho?........,Pathan: hum sooch raha tha ke aghar tum humara ammi hota tu hum be kitna khoobsoorat hota........,
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Aik pathan Quaid-e-azam ke mazaar par ja kar dua kar raha tha........,Mera prize bond har soorat main nikalna chahiyie........,Jessay hi woh mazaar se bahar aaya kisi ne uss ki jaib se prize bond nikaal liya........,Woh dobara mazaar par gaya aur bola........,Jinnah Sahab........,Pehlay puri baat tu samjh liya karien........,
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Dukaandar pathan say: Lala tum har rooz mobile ka naya battery kyun letay ho?........,Pathan: Bacha har rooz scrren par likha aata hai........,Battery lo........,Battery lo........,
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Aik pathan sochta raha........,Sochta raha........,Sochta raha........,Sari zindagi sochta raha........,Sochta raha........,Aur akhir sochtay sochtay hi mar gaya ke meri behan ke 3 bhai hain tu mere 2 kyun?........,
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Jo loog arrange marriage karty hain woh zindagi bhar larty hain........,
Aur jo loog love maariage karty hain........,
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Hondi onaa naal vi kutteyan wali aye par o das day nai........,
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Hum pagal uss ke peechay........,Woh pagal kisi aur ke peechay........,Koi aur pagal aap ke peechay........,Aap pagal kisi aur ke peechay........,Woh be pagal kisi aur ke peechay........,Wah Wah Wah........,Saray pagal aagay peechay........,
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Hum ne aap ko dil main basaya Geo samjh kar........,Aannkhon main sajaya Star Plus samjh kar........,Yadoon main yaad kia Zee Tv samjh kar........,Aur aap ne humien bhula diya PTV samjh kar........,
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Machar ka bacha pehli baar urra jab wapis aaya tu uss ke baap ne poocha pehli dafa urr ke kessa laga........,Bacha: Bohat maza aaya har koi mujhy dekh kar taali baja raha tha........,
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Baap: Such batao ye 100 ka note kahan say laye ho?........,Beta: Mujhy gali main para hua mila hai aur agar aap ko yaqeen nahi hai tu bahar ja kar dekh lien 1 admi abhi tak dhoondh raha hai........,
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Ameer log: Mother beta 15 minutes reh gaye hain uth jao school jana hai........,Ghareeb mother: Ais haramday di wakhi wich lat maar jaan ke khais wat ke suta e........,
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Class main teacher ne kaha jo stupid hai woh khara ho jaye........,Ik bacha khara ho gaya........,Teahce: Tum stupid ho?........,Student: Nahi aap akeeli kharien thien tu mujhy acha nahi laga........,
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Aik ghar se har waqt hansnay ki awazien aati thien........,Aik sahab uss ghar gaye ta ke itni khush ghawaar zindagi ka raaz maloom kar sakien........,Shohar nay bataya ke meri biwi larti hoye mujhy jootay se maarti hai........,Joota lagay tu woh hanasti hai aur na lagay tu main hansta hoon........,
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Wife: Main ne aap ki birthday par itni mehangi cheez li hai na ke aap dekhtay hi khush ho jayien gay........,Husband: Shukar hai tumhien mera be khayal aaya dikhao........,Wife: Main abhi pehan ke aayi........,
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Sargoodha main aik bacha paida hua hai........,Paidaish ke waqt uss ka weight 15kg tha jo barhta gaya aur 15 din main 50kg ho gaya........,Incredible but true........,Bacha majj da c........,
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Pagal khanay main sub pagal dance kar rahay thay........,Par aik pagal khamoosh baitha tha........,Doctor ne samjha shayad ye pagal theek ho gaya hai........,Doctor: tum khamoosh kyun ho?........,Pagal: Bewaqoof main dulhan hoon........,
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Technology has its own limitations........,Google may be the most powerful search engine........,Magar........,Masjid wich gawachi jooti oda piyo v nai labb sakda........,
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Naraz kyun hotay ho chalay jatay hain teri mehfil say Faraz........,Apnay hissay ke 2 samosay tu utha lenay do........,
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Aadmi marty waqt apni biwi say: Tumhari lamaari say 10 laakh ka set main ne churaya tha aur 50 laakh ki car be main ne choori ki thi........,Biwi: Koi baat nahi tumhien zehar be main ne hi diya hai........,
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Dil ki tanhai ko awaaz bana letay hain........,Bijli jab jaati hai manji kothay pay charha letay hain........,
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Biwi ki farmaishon say tang aa ke shohar khudkushi karna chala........,Biwi kahan chalay?........,Shohar khudkushi karnay........,Biwi black saari tu le do tumharay soogh main kia pehno gi........,
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Aik maraasi kareelay khareednay gaya........,Sabzi wala sabzi ko paani laga raha tha........,Maraasi khara intizaar karta raha........,Jab kafi dair ho gai tu ghussay say kehta hai........,Jay enaan nu hoosh aa gaya aye tay kilo sanu vi tool diyo hahahaha lolx........,
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Sherry rehman ke dard mand dil ki awaaz........,Husn hazir hai muhabbat ki saza paanay ko........,Koi juttay say na maray mere deewany ko........,Geo zardari hahahahah lolx........,
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Itna na yaad aaya karo ke raat bhar so na sakien........,Dopehar 2 baje aankh khulti hai tu ammi naashta nahi detien........,
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Apni zindagi main to faqat andheeray hi andheeray hain Faraz........,Woh log aurr hain jinhon ne UPS lagwaye hoye hain........,
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Gabbar: Ary O Faraz! kitne admi thay?........,Faraz: Pata nahi sarkar! Main to Aurtien gin raha tha........,
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Faraz ke dunya say rukhsat hone ke baad abb........,Wasi Shah ka kalaam arz hai~........,~Itna tu humien be pata hai Wasi........,Water + Dahi is equal to Lassi........,
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Usay kaha tha aik meter kapra zyada lay lo Faraz........,Ab kehti hai meri phullaan vali kurti hoyi vakhiyan tun tang way........,
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SoChTa hoOn apnA moBile k!si FaQeer ko daY dOon FaraZ........,Tere roOoz roOz Ke puRaanaY sMs mujHse paRhe nahE jataY........,
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Baap ne betay ko cigrate peetay dekha tu usski pocket money band kardi........,Aik din betay koi paisay de kar cold drink lenay bhaja........,Uss raat baab ne phir betay ko cigrate petay howay dekha........,Baap bara hairan hua ke betay ke paas paisay kahan say aaye........,Beta bola kiss ne kaha tha pepsi per 5 rpey kam kardo lolx........,
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The Great "Usman" says........,Every one is not my friend but my friend are not like everyone........,Shakespear mama nai lagda har gal da........,Kadi kissay apnay tay vi yaqeen kar laya karo........,
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1 billi sheikh ke ghar say rooti hui nikli........,Kisi ne billi say ronay ki waja pochi.........,Billi ne jawab diya ik tay menu maarya utton mera choowa v kho laya........,
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Faqeer: Sheikh ke ghar aaya aur kaha main Allah ka mehmaan hoon........,Sheikh uss ka haath pakar kar masjid main lay gaya aur kaha Allah ka ghar ye hai........,
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Saari zindagi kar ke barbaad ishq ki lazzat chakh li hai.........,Uss ne be burqa pehan liya hai hum ne be daari rakh li hai........,
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2010 ka super hit message interview to sardar: Where is abu dabi?........,Sardar replied: Jithay ammi dabi oday naal e zara paran kar ke abu dabi........,
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Chuk lo razaiyan aa gai aye thand........,Haath pao jaybaan wich tay boway karo band........,Kha kha monghphali paa diyo gand........,Saday walon sub nuu Happy Happy thaand........,
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Aik pehalwaan aik waqt main 80 rootiyan khata tha........,Uss ko circus walon ne dekha aur hire kar liya........,Pehla show shuro hua uss ne 80 rootiyan kha li........,Agla show 1 hour baad shuro howa aur uss ne phir 80 rootiyan kha lien........,Log bohat hairaan thay aur 3rd show ke liye aur ziada rush ho gaya........,1 hour baad jab 3rd show shuro hona tha tu woh ghaib ho gaya........,Uss ko dhoondhtay howay jab uss ghar pohanchay tu........,Woh baitha rooti kha raha tha jab uss say waja pochi tu woh bola........,Hoon main naukri hi karda rawan rooti na khawan........,
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